Random Tidbits

There is this guy in my office who is a complete asshole. You know the type...I'm sure everyone (even those without offices) have them around at some point in their day. He's a short, little man...even shorter than me. He struts around, with his chest all puffed out, looking all important. He never smiles. Never returns my cheerful good mornings. Never even looks at me really. I'm staff and he's AN ATTORNEY. I imagine he thinks of his title a bit like that. I usually chuckle silently to myself after he passes, thinking that he probably suffers from short dick syndrome. LOL.

In any event, I've written this guy off as bad job a long time ago. And then, this morning as I was standing in line at Starbucks, I watched him come in with his wife. And I saw a man transformed. His eyes crinkled. He couldn't keep the smile from blossoming on his face every time he looked at the woman he loved. She was the same way. She was focused completely on him and he on her. They kissed a couple of times and it was with such obvious passion that it almost felt obscene. Almost...except that it was loving and not sexual. I happen to know that they have young twins (I saw them once in the elevator with their girls...and he was just as pompous then). I know how much work it is to raise children, and so I was as impressed by their ability to hang on to that kind of love for each other amist the craziness of baby-raising.

In that one moment, this pompous asshole became a human being and I realized yet again how many layers there truly are to every one of us. It was a good reminder.

As for vacation planning, Miss. Andrea, it's what I do. I enjoy discovering places that I'll be going at some point! We'll decide as a family where we truly want to go, but I like to have references all over the country (and the world) of what is possible. That's all. And it kills the bored hours at work when I am refusing to work.

Bailey has discoved bubbles. We've played with them before, and she enjoys herself, but she's never sought them out. Until last night. She ran over to the place where the bubbles are kept and stood under them pointing and calling out "Momma" "Bubbles" over and over again. I have no idea where she learned that they were called bubbles. We haven't played with them frequently. It was cute. Both the asking and then watching her chase bubbles, get over-excited and then squeal. Cute, cute, cute.

Speaking of cute - when you ask Bailey if she is sleepy, she squints her eyes up, then takes her finger and pokes it near her eyes, usually pulling down her eyelid. If she is not sleepy, she just shakes her head no. We find it incredibly convenient that she tells us when she is sleepy. Not that we don't already know from her behavior, but it is easier knowing that she knows she's tired. And it's super cute watching her tell on herself. LOL!

We're in language development stage right now. I have no idea where she learns the words that she learns. I have even less idea how she understands everything. There is a lot that she doesn't say, but when you talk about it she obviously knows what it is. For instance, she won't (can't?) say open or closed yet, but she sure does know what open and closed means. Yesterday, she was helping me make dinner and I asked her to get me two pots. She opened the drawer where the pots were and picked up two pots and handed them to me. She seemed undecided and then grabbed the third small pot. I told her that I only needed two, so she put the small pot back in. As she was stepping back, she reached back in. I thought that she was going to take another pot out, so I started to correct her. Instead, she adjusted the pot so that it was back in its proper location within the drawer, perfectly straightened out and even. Then she closed the drawer. How funny it is to see Bailey imitate me. I'm compulsive about my kitchen. She's obviously witnessed that. So the next chore was to get the ravioli out of the fridge. She was able to follow those instructions, but didn't know what the ravioli was until I pointed it out to her. Apparently ravioli isn't in her vocabulary yet. We opened it and I asked her to throw away the plastic cover. I asked her to "put it in the garbage". She seemed confused. Didn't know what "garbage" meant. So then I asked her to "throw it away". She knew exactly what that meant and did it.

Watching this process was enlightening. Obviously, we say "throw it away" more than we refer to the garbage. Which makes sense. We usually talk about taking the garbage out when she is in bed. She doesn't hear that very often.

It also drove home a very important point. None of these things have been directly taught to her. She's learning through observation and her own listening skills.

The point. Time to stop swearing. Like now. Right now. Right this second. Another "fuck" should never cross my lips when she is around. Obviously, I'll fail at that...but seriously, this is the time when she could open up her cute little mouth and reveal the true nature of MY potty mouth.

As for Littler Honey, all is well. I will not say out loud that Kelly is feeling better because that my jinx the very minor trend we are seeing. She is still vomitting every morning and she is still quite nauseated most of the time. But her energy is picking back up. Actually, it's not. Her energy is declining (in direct proportion to the growth spurt the baby is going through). But she seems more alive - more together. Less consumed by trying to make it through each minute.

But I'm not saying that out loud.

A couple of days ago, we recieved the gift that I had purchased for Kelly. I got her a pair of Uggs slippers. LOL - these things cost $100 bucks. I was thinking they better have built in hands to massage her feet. But I had a gift card from my boss, so I got them. With the other $100 I bought some baby clothes. Some very cute, very expensive baby clothes that we never would have gotten if we hadn't had a gift card. And lord, they are CUTE! They are gender neutral, of course. Three onsies, a little pant outfit and hat, bib and booties. They all match each other. The are my favorite sage, olive and unbleached cotton colors. While I stood there looking at them, I got excited again. I keep having these moments. It so different for me, this time, not being the birth mother. I don't have that child in my uterus, reminding me every day of what is happening and what is coming. I also don't have the kind of time I had before Bailey was born. In some ways I feel like a bad mother and partner because I'm not falling all over myself with anticipatory excitement. But the thing is, I am excited. I find myself rolling the world "children" around in my mouth and mind four or five times a day. I've had a couple of dreams that include a black-haired boy with curly hair. My whole heart is focused on this child and bringing this child to us. But the reality is that our new baby will share the spotlight with Bailey in a way that Bailey never had to. My heart is shared now, not captivated by one soul. So it's different. In no way less meaningful. But different.

I guess this has gotten long enough. The term "tidbits" doesn't apply anymore. Perhaps I should rename this post "Random Novel". Back to non-work.